There’s a four-letter word which is used rather a lot in our house. Kids say it first thing in the morning. When they get home from school. Then right up to bedtime.
I suppose I should be grateful it’s not a swear word – but it’s still driving me crazy.
Here’s the list of its top uses and what the children really mean when they say it. Some of the sayings might sound quite familiar…
JUST coming! means: I have absolutely no intention of coming until mum really starts shouting.
It’s JUST not fair! means: mum has asked me to do something I don’t want to do (why does she always pick on me and not my siblings?) I will try and get out of it by protesting loudly and making her feel as if she is treating me in an outrageously unjust manner.
JUST five more minutes means: I am playing my favourite computer game and if I say ‘just five more minutes’ mum might forget to come back in five minutes and I’ll get another half an hour on it before she remembers me again.
JUST one more… means: Mum has let us have some sweets but however many you get you always want more. Adding a ‘please’ and giving a cute smile often gets a positive result, especially if you’re a toddler.
It JUST fell out of my hand means: I’ve broken a piece of mum’s favourite crockery. Instead of admitting it and saying sorry (which I hate doing) I’ll keep insisting it wasn’t my fault.
I JUST forgot means: I knew I had homework to do but I couldn’t be bothered so I’ll pretend I had a memory lapse.
You’re JUST mean means: I want a new toy or computer game, mum won’t buy it as she says it’s too expensive, so I’ll make her feel bad by making out she’s a real miser.
You JUST don’t understand means: I’ve got a problem but I’m sure I won’t like mum’s (sensible) solution to it, so it’s easier to say to her that she doesn’t ‘get’ children.
You JUST don’t love me means: I want to stay up late but mum has said no. I feel extremely frustrated even though I know I am being totally unreasonable, so I will say something to really hurt her. Normally followed by slamming of bedroom door.
The final one was added by the children who claim I say it all the time. I so don’t know what they’re talking about.
I’VE JUST ABOUT HAD ENOUGH!! means: Get out of mum’s way NOW as we have pushed her to the absolute limit and she is about to lose it…